Days 26-29...

Oh dear, how does money go so fast!!! I just dont understand... hes not home to spend it, and Im at work so I cant spend it... How does this work... lol... boy things are blah today, I have been trying to get gas all day and every time I do it says see attended but no one opens on base until ten... gggrrr then to add on top of it, Im allergic to cali... my allergies have been off the wall... gosh I wish I went home... I know fl isnt any better, and mi is still thunder storming... but home sounds like a nice place to be at this time of our lifes... I feel bad for my hubby tho... He is kinda getting hit hard now with being home sick... usually when hes gone out to the field its for about a month or less... and now we have been over our mountain of our first month... He is kinda relizing that hes not coming home this time, that he has to stay longer... and he sent me the most pretties flowers ever... tulips bulbs!!! and in his letter said this way they will last for ever just like our love... I have the most amazing hubby in the world! I love him and miss him so darn much... but I have so many surprises for him when he gets home, like Im getting into super shape! so Im going to be fit and well its for naughty purposes lol... and a little surprise that barks! and I got a new BIG cuffy bed thats a king size! I upgraded from a full to a king for $20! in perfect shape and only 3 months old! The family I got it from is moving to japan! and they arent taking much with them so I got it! YAY!!! and I finally a job so Im trying to save his deployment money and just use mine for food and gas... See so far Im on tract on what to do, I just need to do it lol... and the best part of him leaving is teaching me how to fix my truck on my own! I need to change out a head light and change my lines to my wiper fluid cords bc they have a break some where in either the line or the tank bc every time I use my back wiper it gushes out wiper fluid under the front of my truck lol... and I changed my wipers that was easy expect the back one, it needed the pliers for that one lol... man I feel so useful now... lol OH and BESTEST part! I CAN DRIVE HIS STICK SHIFT NOW! barely but I cant do it with out killing or stalling it now! lol... wow... now to start looking around for a two bedroom place lol... see things are pulling them selfs together and its making me feel like I can do this! theres just some times those day like the smorning when I just need a hug from him to keeping me going lol... but hope you all have a better day then Im having lol...ttfn!

Days 22-26....

WOW its been a MONTH!!! and I think im getting sick again, my throat hurts a bunch... and yeah... but I started work today and it was a blast!!! it was amazing... lol not much going on really just working and have school set up think I might just take it easy this summer and try to get things done for my cna... but yeah... see lol not much going on lol... but ttfn im going to get early lol... nite!

Days 20-22...

So I am all signed up for this summers classes, and I have everything in place... I think... lol Work starts this mon and we finally are going to get a little extra money in the bank... which he will not touch... I know hes deployed and we get a little extra money... but really its not that much, and we cant afford it right now... I really wanted to get half the rent paid off this week so I can split up the rent for every two weeks instead of getting pound with the whole payment on the 1st... It really hurts us for the first two weeks of every month... I just hope I can get money on a better hold... and I really want him to see that I can do it on my own and that he has nothing to worry about... I hope this all pays off...

And mothers day is coming up, and he got his mom the most beautiful set of flowers and is sending them to her work... I know its only his mom and it sounds so romantic, but thats how my hubby is lol... its so sweet... and Im making the cards for both moms, and I got my mom banks, ones an elephant and ones a bear, and the other is a penguin, she collects them so I thought they would be super cute...

I hate to say it but I never got flowers from him before... and I mean he has taken me on the most amazing dates in the world but I really wish he could do the little things more, like the cute little I love you notes he use to write me, or the cute little voice mails he use to leave me, and right now, I wish I never took those for granted... I miss them a lot... and for some reason today I just been missing him a lot today... For some reason this week, I felt so far from him... We just never had anything to talk about, and I know hes tired, but I would love to hear all of his woes, and fears, and tears, again... I hope we dont grow apart, and Im trying not to let us, but I feel lost, and hes a different person, and I just cant wait to get him home, and have him in my arms, and I can make him happy and we can be us again... I just want us to be happy, I want him to be happy... of all things I want what he wants... I sometimes feel Im not good enough for him... He such an amazing person... but Im going to bed... so night ya'll...

Oh boy day 15-19....

Wow well not much has happened... I sent him is first two boxes lol, with a home made blanket to keep him warm at night... and I made him a card with a bunch of tear jerking words... I cant believe how much is going on, but at the same time nothing new has happen... I start work up here soon, and well Im missing my hubby at night when I go to bed... (in all ways if you know what I mean lol) I really wish I could hear from him more... Even tho he is online almost every day... he doesnt really im me much... I guess talking to me, mkaes him miss home more... bc he is really quite or asking about bills.... idk, but I feel a little worried about it... I mean I know he's tired, and bored out there bc their not doing much... but I wish there was something more there, like I know he misses me a lot, and I know he is going through the same thing I am, but sometimes, I just wish he would have more to say...

We have been wanting to save some money up, but everything that could happen, has happened.... I got a flat, and my spear was flat... the cats ruined my shower curtain, and Im trying to save money so I can split the rent up into every two weeks, bc the first month is really hard on us, bc its all full in one payment of rent water, and trash... rent in cali NOT cheap.... and this was the cheapest place in cali we cold find... Well I start work next week so We'll have some extra money coming in here soon...

Well thats everything lol... see told you not much going one...

Day 13-14

So I cant write much today very busy! I have a dentist apt to fix a root canal done when I was like 8 lol... But I want to get the crown fixed before he gets home... Im getting the overwhelming feeling again... I think I only get it bc I dont have a fix way to pay all the bills yet... and we have the credit card maxed out, and we really dont make that much, well enough to keep us alive and pay off all the bills and we really dont have a lot of bills but idk its just me I guess. lol I havent heard from him in a while again, and he makes everything so easy lol... I just wish he would call again... I missed him on fb last night bc I was playing sims and not paying attention to my fb... I was just relaxing bc of the meds the dentist has me taking, I cant do much on them lol... but I have to get going here. I'll write more later... wish me luck at the dentist lol

Day Twelve...

Wow I cant believe it will be two weeks in two days! thank god it has all flown by fast so far... lets keep it that way... So Im a little down today... The dentist is fixing my front teeth this week, and I hate to do it alone... I really wish he was here to take me there and home... but it must be done...
And not to minchen I found out two more of my friends are prego... I cant believe it... Im starting to get jealous of everyone... I really am wanting him home today because I want to start our family soon... I really cant wait to see what our sons going to look like... But with in due time right lol... Man some of the other marine wifes around me make me feel so young, so of these girls are so wise, they put me to shame... they are strong and amazing women and I do have to say every one on the USMC ladies email group they have helped so much... I really cant believe how wise some of those women are... I would just like to thank them all for all the help and hopes they've given me...

Day ten and eleven!

Hey ya'll!!! its been two weeks since he left and I finally got the first phone call!!!! super excited to hear his voice! He is doing good at a good base and hates the food lol... but other then that he is good... thats all I wanted to hear was he is doing good... I feel like I can make it through when i hear him tell me it will be ok... other wise I start thinking the wrose when he doesnt call...

so many days left until he comes home but I cant wait! he said he wants to get a basset puppy when he gets home so I am going to surprise him with one when he gets home! and Im setting up our wedding renewals, and I got us matching rings that say "true love waits" oh I cant wait to see his face when I give it to him... he is going to be so excited!!! I even have a friend who is going to be on the side hiding and taking pics of us when I give him the rings... we're going to do it at the beach!

Only a few more months... thats all i have to keep telling my self!!! I can make it through but its not easy lol... Oh my I cant stop smiling and crying lol... I called my father in law and told him that he called and that he'll be on again tonight at nine, and we talked for an hour! I love my in-laws if it wasnt for them I couldnt do this.... they help alot even tho their so far away... well I am going for a run... One of my goals is to be in super good shape when he gets home, and well I am going to do it! lol... a year should be long enough to have amazing flat tummy lol...

but keep following!!! thanks to those who are following and helping me get throw this!!!

Day Nine...

Omg ok so today I thought to make myself busy and well i went out with my friend ame, and misty... and well that didnt work out as planed... right in the middle of swimming, I got a nose bleed, and idk what happened... thats my 4th nose bleed in 2 months... I need to go get that checked out lol... but instead ame and I left the pool and deiced to just go home...

That made me sad about today but I MISSED HIM ON FACEBOOK AND HIS CALL.... I hate my self for that not to michen there is something wrong with his bank account and didnt put me on his account so now I need to fax my power of att. papers in to get that fixed... Idk things feel like there falling apart today... and It makes me super up set... not to michen I havent slept in most two weeks... everything is getting to me, and Idk but you think I'd be prego... and well tested twice now, and nothing... and Im going to the docs in a week to find out what is wrong with me... ever since he left, my world fell apart and I feel so lost... I know this isnt a happy post but what more can I say I missed him, and hanging out with misty and her friends, and they all had their hubbys there with them kissing and stuff, and Im just missing him so much...

I thought I was ready to get out and make friends, but really Im not and every one makes me so jealous... I never really had him for more then I want... He was only in my arms for six months... and now I have to wait seven to just even think about even seeing him again... I miss his kisses so much and most of all his voice... what I would do to hear his voice... well Im going to bed, try and get sleep though all I can ever think of is him... Am I stupid for not letting my self get out there while he's gone... or am just stupid for not trying hard enough to find something to fill my time with... God please help me...

Days one through Eight...

Ok as day one, I was a mess I spent the night in the parking lot after his buses left because I was crying so much I couldnt leave... I just sat there stairing at the roof of my car thinking omg what are we getting our selfs into... how am I going to live the next year by my self... how is this all going to work out? I was so scared... We have been trying to have a baby but we dont know if it has happened yet... the past few months nothing, so this was our last chance to try before he left... I really dont want to do it while hes gone, but I want a child so bad Im willing to do it... Plus his sgt said he will fight to get him home if it does happen for the birth... Which made me a little more at ease... I am hoping so hard... Im scared to take the test because what if it did say no, I havent talked to him in a week now, what would I say... sorry hunny no baby, again... I really hope so... so keep your fingers crossed lol...

But the first week wasnt to be though I did cry oh so much I did hang in there, and try to keep my head up. Being new here I still dont have any friends, and with a military family my self I dont have any family around here either... I am doing this on my own... no support expect over the phone... and its not much help because I am three hours behind most of my family so by the time I get off of work to call someone their all in bed... I try and write him every day to make sure he at least hears from me, and knows I there for him... I just got the boxes I ordered from the post office so I can send my first care package to him! I dont know what to send him beside pictures, and cigs, a a thing of cards my nephews got him to make sure he says busy and as kyle said to come back rich! lol my hubby is super good at poker lol... but I dont know what more to send him... If you all have any ideas please comment!!! lol...

But now its day eight, and Im still a bit of a mess but hanging in there, I have one of my friends here still but she just got out of the marine corps and is going back home soon. and we are going to do a road trip! to go see my mom while we're down there, and so we dont have to stop and get a hotel or anything... But other then that I do have some plans and trying to keep busy for now...
But will write more later, I have to get some things done today and I think Im going to sit in the sun to get some color... lol... have a nice night!